need to level up? book your Power 30 session with me here


 

the not sorry method

this might be the only book you ever need to read to be successful

 

“The amateur allows his worth and identity to be defined by others. The amateur craves third-party validation. The amateur is tyrannized by his imagined conception of what is expected of him. He is imprisoned by what he believes he ought to think, how he ought to look, what he ought to do, and who he ought to be. 
– Steven Pressfield


THIS BOOK. I always come back to it. With laser-like precision, Steven Pressfield gets to the guts of what it takes to be a professional + reminds you of what you are if you are not. The writing is meant for entrepreneurs, artists + creatives. But not for the faint of heart. It will cut through your bull sh*t with no apology or comfort. 

Turning Pro requires you to decide if you are an amateur or a professional + then demands that you prove it – every f*cking day. 

If you’re stuck this book will pull you up + out.

Mad love,
Alicia.

→ to pick up your copy of Turning Pro go here


need some advice? book your Power 30 session with me here


how to stay focused right now

Is anybody else finding it really hard to focus right now?

Working on one thing only, for a few consecutive hours seems impossible sometimes, doesn’t it? Between social media, your people, deadlines + real self-care, where does the time go? It’s easy to feel like there are not enough hours in a day… at least, I was starting to feel that way + then I saw this {again}…

I know you’ve already seen it before too. But the simplicity of it has hit me hard for 2017; it’s not about your time, it’s about your priorities. You will slay or you will not slay. No in between. So with that in mind, here are a few things I am doing to stay focused on my goals this year.

  • choose an accountability partner + set a schedule. I am not talking about the friend that convinces you a bag of chips is an acceptable meal. I am talking about the tough love friend that sees you clearly + can speak to your vision with their eyes closed. The friend that listens + pays attention. The friend who looks you in the eye + says “get your sh*t together + stop being so basic.” Ouch. Yes, that one. Set a time to talk to that friend once a week for one hour {preferably on a Monday to set the tone!}. Never miss this call + never let her down. But also, if you do not have a friend who’s that committed to you, you can use me…for real, click here. 
  • set micro goals. You have a big ambitious dream, but you also have to get things done every day to make it happen. I have found that, taking some time on Sundays to set a few “must complete” goals for each day of the week, really goes a long way to maintain momentum + build your confidence. You don’t scale a mountain by leaping; you do it, one step at a time…without stopping!
  • f*ck personal social media use + internet surfing + watching TV. You know exactly what I mean here. If you make time to watch a cat climb a yogi in downward dog or know exactly what’s happening in like 6 shows or have to check at least 3 blogs/gossip sites before you can start your work – YOU ARE WASTING YOUR TIME + more important, YOU DO NOT GET TO COMPLAIN THAT YOU DO NOT HAVE ENOUGH TIME. Honestly, this is my biggest pet peeve, if you can speak on everything but your own productivity, then you’re not taking yourself seriously. You are not taking your goals, your work or your vision seriously. Make some necessary disciplined decisions about how you allocate your time. Right now.
  • stop eating like a 13 year old. My work + research in holistic nutrition has shown me, time + again, that you’re eating all the wrong things for focus + productivity or worse, hardly eating at all. Sugar, dairy, processed foods, refined carbohydrates + skipping meals are bringing you down. Period. Sure the temporary biochemical response feels good, but these foods do not have enough of what it takes to fuel the mind + body of a successful person. If you’re using food for comfort + stress management, you are placing your capacity for wealth at the mercy of your food cravings. Sounds risky right?
  • learn to meditate. You have heard this already, but it’s with good reason. The fastest + simplest way to keep your focus is to learn to meditate. Just like an athlete trains the body for their sport, you can train your mind for your life. Yes, I admit {without apology} this is a service I offer, but this fact does not make learning to meditate less valuable to you. If you haven’t already figured out that self-mastery is essential to your success, your journey is much longer than you think my friend. I teach high-performance meditation to people who want to go further, faster + who just want to be better at everything {to work with me + schedule your required introductory session, go here}.

Lack of direction, not lack of time, is the problem. We all have twenty-four hour days.― Zig… Click To Tweet


need some advice? book your Power 30 session with me here


Never be romantic about how you make your money.

― Gary Vaynerchuk

 

Seriously.

Get more Gary Vaynerchuk in you life:

powerful simple advice from future Jets owner @garyvee Click To Tweet

Focus on where you want to go,
not on what you fear.
― Anthony Robbins

how to become famous, part 1

{I admit, I am really late to the Robin Sharma game but these tips* are epic…} 

1. Model the mindsets, habits and behaviors of the people performing at the level you want to play at. Surround yourself with as many world-class experts in your field as you can possibly network with.

2. Teach your craft. As you share what you’re learning about in your area of expertise, it deepens your understanding. And heightens your awareness.

3. Fail as quickly as you can. Each time you stumble, study the data, recalibrate and iterate your next move. Do this daily and you’ll see steady gains in your performance standards.

4. Become monomaniacally focused on knowing all there is to know about one or two things. The secret to Mastery is concentration of attention. Period.

5. Read. It’s something too few people do on a daily basis. Reading collapses learning time–and allows the brilliance of the best to rub off on your thinking.

6. Get a mentor. I’ve had a number of key mentors in my life and watching them show up at peak was a game-changer. You just can’t reach your personal Everest without some help.

7. Practice insane amounts of hours. Anders Ericsson is the world’s pre-eminent researcher on exceptional performance. His research {popularized by Malcolm Gladwell} showed that it takes 10,000 hours of deliberate practice to make an expert. Put in the time and out will come the expert.

8. Go to your edges. Elite athletes, violinists, writers and chess players all do the same thing: every day they have specific times that they push their skills to the edge. And by relentlessly pushing their talents past what’s comfortable, their talents quickly expand.

9. Play to win versus playing to avoid failing. Experts have a tendency to pursue their idealized image of excellence while average performers behave in a way designed to avoid making mistakes. Big difference.

10. Remember that things you once found hard you now find easy. You are built to grow, to flourish and to adapt to new standards.

for part 2 go HERE

*edited tips; for the full article + more useful tips + tools from Robin Sharma, click HERE.

hard question of the month: what does whatever it takes mean to you?

how to give a presentation: advice from anthony robbins

{ok, he didn’t give me the advice personally but you know how much I love the guy so I don’t think he’ll mind}

In the 2014 Advice Issue of Fortune Magazine, Anthony Robbins is featured as the CEO whisperer; it’s a great title but for me he’ll always be a life whisperer – his book Unlimited Power changed my life when I was 17. No one had told me that I was, or could be, the master of my fate. To learn, at such a young age, that by taking a proactive approach to life and business I could improve my odds of becoming successful was invaluable. The book shaped the way I made decisions and cultivated a sense of self-worth in me that was unavailable from external sources. Anthony Robbins taught me that I had the power to create my own path and validate my own pass. SAY WORD.

Robbins’ Rules: How to Give a Presentation
Five tips for engaging a crowd like Tony.

1 DO YOUR HOMEWORK

“My first thing in preparing for a presentation,” says Robbins, “is you’ve got to know your audience and what their deepest needs are, their deepest desires, and their deepest concerns. That’s more important than anything else. You have to carve your message and really make sure that it’s going to hit the mark for who you’re speaking with. So I usually do quite a bit of homework in advance, and I have a team of people who also do homework. You can’t add value until you know their needs.”

2 RESPECT YOUR AUDIENCE

“It’s not enough just to know your audience. You’ve got to honestly respect them too. You can’t influence someone you’re judging. So when I sit down and do the slides, I think, ‘Who’s in this audience? What do I respect about them? What do I appreciate about them?’ That gives me a connection with them that I—and they­—can feel.”

3 GO DEEP QUICKLY

“The next question is to ask, ‘How am I going to engage them from the very beginning—to quickly get to what matters to them?’ And to engage other people, you’ve got to be engaged. One way to engage is with shock. Or entertainment. But I think, ‘Let’s engage with the truth. Let’s go for what’s real and raw.’”

4 KNOW YOUR OUTCOME

“You need an outline of what you want to do, but the key is to know your outcome. I pick outcomes that I’m passionate about. I don’t think anyone should ever speak about anything they’re not passionate about. If you’re not passionate about something, no one else is going to be, and you’re wasting everyone’s time.”

5 EMBRACE SPONTANEITY

“Some people clearly need a sequence in their presentation to be able to function, and I understand that. But you also have to be able to flex so that you can be real and in the moment. People are starving for spontaneity. Everybody’s sick of watching somebody do a PowerPoint. I mean, it’s just absurd.”

for the whole article, click here

 

click on the image to sign up for the ALICIA™ podcast

what attractive people do differently

{this post is based on Inc.com article titled 9 Things Incredibly Attractive People Do Differently, I hate the title but the content was good so here it is with the AM™ remix – link to original article below}

1. They smile…a lot.

Many of us walk around grim-faced with all of our life’s stresses mapped across our face; what if we thought more like an optimist or focused on the things we have to be grateful about? Smiling is contagious and also affects your bio-chemistry in a positive way. Joy is attractive. Start with your smile.

2. They dress to kill.

“Dressing well doesn’t require a lot of money, but it does require a bit of thought and attention. Incredibly attractive people are fashion conscious not due to vanity but because they know that clothing can set the right mood and tone. They know when to dress it up or take it casual to fit the appropriate environment…Wear fashion proudly and people will notice.”

3. They are careful about what comes out of their mouths.

Just try not to say stupid things and talk to much. We spend so much time trying to sound interesting and smart that we forget to simply take interest in the people around us. Listen. Pay attention. Ask questions.
“Mystery and attraction go together.”

4. They are careful about what goes in their mouths.

“Incredibly attractive people manage their bodies.” Health is important. Making health a priority makes you attractive. Be sure to eat foods that are complementary to your goals, your performance and your commitment to excellence. “Bad habits such as gum, cigarettes and too much alcohol can knock attractiveness down quickly, even though people won’t say anything. Don’t let over indulgence and poor choices get in the way of the respect people should have for you.”

5. They listen.

“Many people are preoccupied with themselves and what’s on their own mind. So when someone genuinely shows interest in another and listens, they immediately strengthen their connection with that person. I have personally become closer with a mere acquaintance through sharing an important story. Incredibly attractive people have mastered the art of listening.” Also see #3.

6. They learn.

“There is no question that smart is sexy and ignorance is ugly. Incredibly attractive people know you don’t have to be a brainiac to maintain admiration, but it helps to be aware of current events and develop your mind. Dedicate an hour a day to making yourself smarter.” The facts are successful people never stop learning and they are always reading. Not watching TV or scrolling through social media – READING non-fiction {business, personal development, health, languages}!!!

7. They take care of themselves

“It’s difficult to be around people who neglect themselves. It’s often a clear sign of low self-esteem. Incredibly attractive people hold themselves in high regard. They are strong in self-confidence and care about their bodies. They enjoy life and want to be around for as long as possible. Make your own body a priority. You don’t have to be a perfect specimen, but good health and maintenance go a long way to show people that you matter.” As a holistic wellness maven, I can tell you that your degree of self-love shows up in your commitment to self-care and that tells people everything. Send the right message.

8. They take care of others

“A generous spirit is a huge attractor.” The purpose of life is to give. Period. Service is the highest form of success.

9. They make others feel attractive as well.

“Each person you meet brings something special to your world. Make sure you enhance theirs with the best you have to offer.”

{for the original article by Kevin Daum click HERE}

some really great notes on feeling the fear + doing it anyway

{some meaningful excerpts from the piece, Breaking Out of Failure by Katie Horwitch}

…those ideas and visions that are actually attainable and feel like they’re in the bag, they light me up from the inside out and keep my fire fueled. To some I might seem stubborn because I am so sure of what I’m after, but to me that done-deal feeling inside is unwavering and actually quite grounded. I am fearless. But here’s the thing: I feel some sort of fear on almost a daily basis. Kind of contradictory, huh? Well…not really…

…fear is a very human emotion; it means there’s something going on a deeper level than we realize. The trick is not to avoid feeling fear, but feel the fear and do it anyway. I’m not talking about putting yourself in situations that you viscerally dislike. If you don’t like roller coasters, you don’t need to go visit Magic Mountain. If heights make you sick, you don’t have to sign up for a skydiving course. In order to be fearless, you don’t have to do anything that goes against who you are. Actually, just the opposite – being fearless, at least to me, means that you move forward, on your own path, without getting in your own way and ending up at a standstill. Being fearless is subjective. Being fearless is personal. Being fearless is a mindset…

…if you find yourself constantly paralyzed from taking action, there are three little gateway questions you can ask yourself: What’s the best that could happen? What’s the worst that could happen? Will either matter six months from now? Usually we’re most afraid of pursuing the things that are most life altering. Asking yourself these questions shifts your focus onto the outcomes that matter – and the outcomes that don’t. In six months, will you have gotten over your so-called failure and moved forward? Probably. Will you just be back where you started? Probably not. Basically, when you put yourself out there and make a leap, you either gain a step forward or a lesson you can use to help propel you forward. Either way, you win. Not even trying? You’re stuck with more of the same and that vague void left by inaction…

For the complete article, click HERE.

am.xo

5 things to do in september

ONE: take yourself out to a lovely dinner

{eat slowly + dress up.  if the thought of doing this mortifies you then there’s probably a bunch of things you won’t do by yourself; which means you are missing out on a lot…probably too much. stop waiting for company. it’s better to be in love with the person you are alone with BEFORE you look for love}.

TWO: get a pair of heels you can walk beautifully in

{lady like heels; not those impossibly high ones they keep shoving down our throats}

THREE: read a book that will better you

{non-fiction + self-help is best…go to the bookstore, go to that section and buy the one that jumps out at you or join my book club remix and have a great book chosen for you}

FOUR: replace one meal with a healthy salad each day

{dinner is best – no creamy dressings + croutons! eat slowly, put your fork down after each bite 

FIVE: get yourself a bouquet of fresh flowers

{inexpensive + pretty is fine, place in a beautiful vase wherever you can see it most often}

 

am.xo

mental toughness

{excerpted + am.com edited from inc.com}

First, the definition:

“The ability to work hard and respond resiliently to failure and adversity; the inner quality that enables individuals to work hard and stick to their long-term passions and goals.”

Now the word:

GRIT.

The definition of grit almost perfectly describes qualities every successful person possesses, because mental toughness builds the foundations for long-term success.

For example, successful people are great at delaying gratification. Successful people are great at withstanding temptation. Successful people are great at overcoming fear in order to do what they need to do. Successful people don’t just prioritize. They consistently keep doing what they have decided is most important.

Here are ways you can become mentally stronger–and as a result more successful:

1. Always act as if you are in total control.

The same premise applies to luck. Many people feel luck has a lot to do with success or failure. If they succeed, luck favored them, and if they fail, luck was against them.

Most successful people do feel good luck played some role in their success. But they don’t wait for good luck or worry about bad luck. They act as if success or failure is totally within their control. If they succeed, they caused it. If they fail, they caused it.

By not wasting mental energy worrying about what might happen to you, you can put all your effort into making things happen.

You can’t control luck, but you can definitely control you.

2. Put aside things you have no ability to impact.

Mental strength is like muscle strength — no one has an unlimited supply. So why waste your power on things you can’t control?

For some people, it’s politics. For others, it’s family. For others, it’s global warming. Whatever it is, you care, and you want others to care.

Fine. Do what you can do: Vote. Lend a listening ear. Recycle, and reduce your carbon footprint. Do what you can do. Be your own change–but don’t try to make everyone else change.

{They won’t!}

3. See the past as valuable training and nothing more.

The past is valuable. Learn from your mistakes. Learn from the mistakes of others.

Then let it go.

Easier said than done? It depends on your perspective. When something bad happens to you, see it as an opportunity to learn something you didn’t know. When another person makes a mistake, don’t just learn from it–see it as an opportunity to be kind, forgiving, and understanding.

The past is just training; it doesn’t define you. Think about what went wrong but only in terms of how you will make sure that next time, you and the people around you will know how to make sure it goes right.

4. Celebrate the success of others.

Many people — I guarantee you know at least a few — see success as a zero-sum game: there’s only so much to go around. When someone else shines, they think that diminishes the light from their stars.

Resentment sucks up a massive amount of mental energy — energy better applied elsewhere.

When a friend does something awesome, that doesn’t preclude you from doing something awesome. In fact, where success is concerned, birds of a feather tend to flock together — so draw your successful friends even closer.

Don’t resent awesomeness. Create and celebrate awesomeness, wherever you find it, and in time you’ll find even more of it in yourself.

5. Never allow yourself to whine. {Or complain. Or criticize.}

Your words have power, especially over you. Whining about your problems always makes you feel worse, not better.

So if something is wrong, don’t waste time complaining. Put that mental energy into making the situation better.

So why waste time? Fix it now. Don’t talk about what’s wrong. Talk about how you’ll make things better, even if that conversation is only with yourself.

And do the same with your friends or colleagues. Don’t just serve as a shoulder they can cry on. Friends don’t let friends whine; friends help friends make their lives better.

6. Focus only on impressing yourself.

No one likes you for your clothes, your car, your possessions, your title, or your accomplishments. Those are all things. People may like your things — but that doesn’t mean they like you.

Genuine relationships make you happier, and you’ll only form genuine relationships when you stop trying to impress and start trying to just be yourself.

And you’ll have a lot more mental energy to spend on the people who really do matter in your life.

7. Count your blessings.

Take a second every night before you turn out the light and, in that moment, quit worrying about what you don’t have. Quit worrying about what others have that you don’t.

Think about what you do have. You have a lot to be thankful for. Feels pretty good, doesn’t it?  Feeling better about yourself is the best way of all to recharge your mental batteries.

am.xo

getting out of the weeds

 

More Mel Robbins because she nails it in 5 minutes.

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